I am employed at full-time I am more at home at work than at home.. I don't have space for my creativity, even if I have all the papers and schools here where I live I can't support myself as an artist I would starve under a bridge. Honestly what is happening here at the moment, I will probably run away from this country I don't know what will happen to me in the future I don't know what to invest in anymore because my mental state is so bad that I should have been locked up in a psychiatric hospital for 3 months like said my doctor, but I can't afford to not work I'll probably never get therapy because it's expensive as hell I don't know if I should deal with living abroad or the therapy and all that I will definitely not give up on drawing and my dreams ....but I don't know how much more I can handle I already feel like a dead person because I don't live I just exist